Small chunk, Master Irish Andy, HUGE chunk, Master Willy Woofter
Yeah, so I got a bit bored with the old template so I decided to cook up a new one quickly in between doin.. stuff yesterday. What was I doin?... Hmm, I really don't remember. I wanna say I was doin work, but that just doesn't seem plausable. Work? What's that?..Neway, tomorrow (or should I say today) is Raisin Sunday which equals a shit load of drinking until one is completely off their faces and then its off to town for drunken debauchery and most likely vandalism... scandelous behaviour! Youngsters these days! I know what your thinking, "Wtf is Raisin Weekend?" Well children, huddle close and listen to auntie Catherine...At my university, it is tradition for 3rd and 4th year students to adopt academic children to supposedly guide them through their first year and make sure they're a-ok. In reality, academic parents are solely for Raisin Weekend. Now Raisin Weekend consists of two days, the Sunday and Monday after Reading Week. Now on the Sunday, you go to your parents house with your other academic siblings and basically your parents get you absolutely off your face drunk by whatever means they can. This is usually achieved via drinking games.
My Raisin Sunday consisted of arriving at the parents house at 1pm, getting handed a cup with my name on it and getting poured a cup of 'special brew' punch as soon as I got through the door. Then came the first game. Now I have no idea what you call them, but we call them 'Strawpedos'. Usually you get a bottle of alcopop, put a straw in it and bend the straw downwards on the outside of the bottle. Then you hold the straw in place, open your gullet and knock the bottle back, by letting the entire bottle just pour down your throat. Now this sounds pretty easy, but it's deceiving. Most people make the mistake of gulping and choking half way through the bottle while giving every1 a shower! This equals guaranteed failure! I of course, like the champion I am, got it down all in one first time! Oooh yeah! *Victory dance* All the others failed miserably! Cept we didn't use straws, they had this homemade apparatus which was basically two bits of industrial tubing stuck together. Works a lot better coz more air gets in so the liquid flows out faster. Good stuff. Then came the boat races, were every1 sits in two lines like your doin 'Rock the Boat' and when you get the signal to go, the first person in the line (which was moi) has to chug their drink as fast as possible and put their cup upside down on their head, and it goes down the line until the last person is finished, and whichever line is fastest is the winner and the losers have to drink a losers concoction. Needless to say we lost and ugh it was fuckin foul. I'm pretty sure it was vodka, sambuca, bacardi breezer and somethin else, blaaa ming. So, then came the 'Never have I ever' game where it goes round in a circle and sum1 says something like 'Never have I ever been skinny dipping' and whoever has has to stand up and take a drink. Pretty juicy stuff if you ask the right questions! Then came the 'Ibble Dibble' game where everybody is assigned a number and you have to say a bit of a tongue twister. So like the first person starts off my saying sumthing like "I'm number 1 ibble dibble with no ibble dibbles, I go to number 3 ibble dibble with no ibble dibbles" and if you fuck up you get an ibble dibble which is basically a big black ash mark from a burnt cork and you have to take a shot. See exibit one after all the drinking games were over and Irish Andy had attacked both me and Will with the cork..
Yes I'm aware I look a complete mess, Can you tell this was later on in the day when we're all complete fucked?!
Then I think we finised off with the 'Whoever pulls away first has to take a drink' game, which is pretty self explanitory! You have to go to kiss the person on your right and however pulls away first has to take a shot of sambuca. It can get pretty interesting if there are two guys or two girls sitting next to each other who are both pretty adamant they're not gona lose... unfortunately we didn't have any1 like that! I was next to Irish Andy, so there were negotiations had b4 the act. Needless to say he lost those negotiations after he gave me a fat lip by elbowing me in the face, on purpose might I add, during the ibble dibble game! Bastard.. you should have seen it the next day... and the week after that... and yes, there was a lot of emotional blackmail! Anyway, em.. what was I saying? Oh yes, Andy had to drink, and then he was next to Will lol so I think Will took that drink, and then Will was next to our other academic sister who he's scared of so he another drink straight away! And that's were we ended coz our academic parents were first aid volunteers. So we chilled in their flat for a bit then hit the pubs, during which I got molested and almost broke my ankle! All in the same pub as well, which I've never been back to since! I think I eventually got back to our halls at bout 3ish... I think.. but I have no idea wot time I crawled into bed at. So 14hrs of non stop drinking woo! During which I got drunk, sobered up and then got drunk again! Twas fandabbydosey!Then briefly, Raisin Monday you go to your parents house at like 9/10 in the morning complete with shaving foam supplies, they dress you up like a complete twat, give you a Raisin Receipt which is some random object (usually stolen the night before) that they write a Latin verse on, that you bring to the Quad, chuck in a skip and then get your foam on! Mwahaha foam fights are fun!
Yes that's right, I'm wearing a bin bag! We were meant to be 'Rubbish Ghosts' i.e. We cba goin to the trouble of making or thinking up a costume for you so heres something we found under the kitchen sink 5 mins before you arrived!
Ok, so, that was last year. This year, we're inviting some peeps over, getting fucked in our own flat, hitting the town, then coming back and drinking even more! And me and Yorkshire wanna go to the foam fight on the Monday morning but we'll see what state we're in. Wow, that was really long winded. Sorry bout that! I could have easily just told you what we were doing this year and skipped over all that shite but hey, I have nothing better to do! Cept my lab, but we're trying to forget about that. Yeah, I should prob get to bed since its 5.45am and I'm starting drinking at noon...
So I eventually got round to getting the old driving test done and dusted. Bout time you might say as I have been able to drive for like 3 years! But hey, better late than never. Plus my theory was about to run out so I kinda had to get my finger out my arse. And all done with a fever of 102 mmmm! Yeah that was a nice little surprise, I thought for once I had escaped the airplane germs but yesterday I slowly died until 8pm when I gave in and went to bed. Then at 12 the mother comes into my room and freaks out coz I'm soo hot and of course forces the thermometer on me, but even I was surprised at a fever of 102.4 Its been a while since I've had a temperature like that. And all because I came home. Coming home is bad for my health.
Yes, I can dream...
